Things I learned over Christmas Break...

1. Regis's last name is Philbin, NOT Philman. It seriously sounds like Philman though.
2. Applebee's does not accept AMEX giftcards. Just another reason for me to hate them besides the sucky food.
3. Cookies don't taste as good when you eat them 5 days in a row.
4. Western New York gets killer tumbleweeds on the highway.
5. Don't wear pearls and a peacoat in Deposit,New York unless you want the locals to treat you with lothsome contempt.
6. If you belong to Citizen's Bank and you use your ATM card at another bank, not only do you get the other bank's fee but Citizen's charges you $2.oo as well.
7. Wegman's ice cream taste better than any other kind of ice cream in the world. And it's cheap.
8. Kyle doesn't know how to order a grande nonfat peppermint mocha with no whip extra foam.
9. Having multiple days in a row off makes me stay up late- as in 4:30 am late.
10. I secretly like roast beef, but when I'm pouty and hungry I say I don't like it and make a big fuss in the deli department.
11. When Kyle asks if you want to do something devilish, ALWAYS say "yes". :)

You Are What you Eat

Can certain foods give you bad dreams? I've had nightmares 2 nights in a row, and usually I have good dreams, not bad ones. Nothing is different with me, I'm perfectly happy with life,and I consuled my dream dictonary and got NO help, so I am forced to think that the cause of the nightmares is external- something I'm eating.
I did a lot of holiday baking over the weekend and I made stuff that I don't eat often- seasoned crackers, peanut butter cookies, peppermint patties, magic layer cookies... All totally yummy, but is something in there making me dream of dead children, doors that open to only more doors, talking corpses, silver pig fetuses washed up on ocean shores and falling out of amusement park rides? Is coconut making me nuts? The obvious solution is to just stop eating the goodies and see if the dreams stop, but that isn't any fun at all! Plus if it's NOT the treats then I'm missing out on all the yummy goodness (that's assuming Kyle has left some yummy goodness for me when I get home from work later). So tonight will be night 3- let's see if the dreams get wierder still or if they stop.

Alternative Sources of Income

I have $17 in my account for the next 2 weeks. And that simply won’t do. So I decided I need to make more money and yesterday I looked up my options on Craigs list. First I found an ad for $300 to go to a company xmas party with a guy, but that sounds too much like a call girl and if he can't find a date I don't think I want to spend time with him. Next ! There are various listings for dancers. And I love to dance! But not without my clothes on, so that's out. There's an ad for a "bikini bartender" in a gentlemen's club that I thought about for a 1/2 second and then realized that as much fun as the movie Coyote Ugly was, it's probably a lot less glamorous in real life. Plus, imagine if I ran into anyone from work? How awkward for both of us. Bottom line is I’m a lawyer now and a fiancé, so I need to keep my clothes on.
So then I started thinking about being an egg donor. It sounded perfect- I get to help a couple get a child, I get to feel all gooey and good about myself for being so selfless and I get paid for it! Plus, I have a law degree and I’m cute so the child would likely be smart and cute too. Sounds great, right? No, not really. The money is good- we’re talking several thousand dollars a cycle, but a cycle is several months long and there are lots of doctor appointments and daily self injections of hormones. PMS is a beast with my normal amount of hormones-if I were taking more I’d probably die of a self induced chocolate overdose or actually, physically bite Kyle’s head off. Plus there’s that whole I have a biological child out in the world somewhere issue. I think it takes a certain kind of person to be able to handle that and I’m not sure I’m one of them.
I look through restaurant listings, telemarketing posts, and so many pyramid schemes it made my head spin. Just when I was about Google “ selling a kidney” I found the answer to my problem- Medical Research Studies! I live in New Haven, home to the fabulous institution of learning that is Yale. Yale with tons of medical and PhD students doing research and lots of moola to throw to willing human lab rats. SCORE. I decided I need ground rules for myself because I don’t want to be the reason they find out a particular medication isn’t save for human consumption. No thanks. So no medications or injections or procedures. I’m not THAT broke. I made a few phone calls and left messages for a brain scan study, a meditation study and an anxiety study. I’m excited to hear back from them and really hope I get to so something- what if they find out how to unlock that unused 90% of my brain? What if I end up with psychic powers? Stay tuned….

The true meaning of friendship

I've figure out how to tell who your best and closest friends are. Surprisingly they are not the ones who buy you bracelets that say BFF on them. Nor are they the ones who call you regularly. Nope. The secret to determining how close you are with someone lies totally in how you are in the bathroom with them.
Before you think I'm completely crazy, hear me out. What happens when you meet someone new and you go to the ladies room together at a public place, for example, you meet your brother's new girlfriend at a restaurant and the 2 of you go to the bathroom. The chatting will go smoothly, until one of you enters the stall. Then you both get quiet until the stall thing is complete (which to be honest probably makes things more awkward...) so that's a level one friendship, an mere acquaintance really.
Your "good" friend, or a level 2 friend is someone with whom you can go into a bathroom like, each enter a stall and the conversation doesn't ever skip a beat. Those are probably where most of the friendships of the girls you see regularly ends up. And that's great. Be thankful for those good friends.
But your best friends, those girls that will literally be there for you no matter what are the girls who can join you in a single toilet no stall room (like at Starbucks) and completely ignore it while you keep on gabbing. If you can do that and not be bothered by it, you know you can talk to them about anything without fear of being looked at oddly or misunderstood. So if you have a good girlfriend and you want to be GREAT friends, just ask if she wants to go to the bathroom with you.
I swear I'm not trying to be crude or crass here. I just really think I'm on to something here. Think about it and I bet you'll agree. And if not, well, I do love the comments!
NOTE- this applies girls only... I don't think it translates to males.

crazy dreamer

So I'm irritated at my fiance. And not for anything he did or forgot to do. No, this crazy lady is mad at him for something that happened in my own subconscious. That's right folks, last night I had a dream-fight with my man and I woke up still angry at him, and now I can't shake the feeling. (I told you I was crazy).
See, I have really realistic dreams and I can do what's called lucid dreaming - its where during the dream I realize it's a dream and can change things at will. It's wicked fun, especially when you realize you're dreaming while falling off a cliff and decide you can fly instead so you just soar around (BEST DREAM EVER!). Or if I wake up from a bad dream I can go back to sleep into the same dream and change what I don't like to resolve it.
That's what I wanted to do this morning when I woke up from a dream at 6:30 am. In the dream I had gotten into a huge fight with my sister over a little black poodle that I had and we were on a cruise ship. I woke up feeling icky over it, so I went back to sleep to try and fix it.
Instead of going back to the cruise ship I was launched into another dream that involved me meeting this smoking hot blond chick, us riding bikes and practicing cheerleading together (down boys, it wasn't that kind of dream) and then me finding out that this girl lived with my fiance and was in love with him. And when I tried to talk to him about it, he didn't care and was really cold and cruel to me.
So I woke up feeling hollow and hurt and angry. Kyle hates when I have dreams like this because he spends all day making up for nothing. He already was nice enough to drive me into work this morning, and I'm still miffed at him. I know I shouldn't be, but I just AM. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to call my sister to give her a piece of my mind.....