Really really really wanna zigazigAH!

While at work I decided to do one of my typical activities - email my friend from law school about random things. It passes the time and makes us feel better about our jobs. Today since I haven’t heard from him I assumed he was busy and therefore set out to think of a topic that I could send a bunch of emails on just to annoy him and make his Blackberry go off repeatedly in a meeting thus increasing his chances of getting fired or at least yelled at (this is how I deal with my inner jealousy that he has a job as an associate in Manhattan and I don’t).
So I decided to send him lyrics from cheesy pop songs in the hopes that one of them would stick in his head and stay there (don’t you HATE that?) And as I’m typing out lyrics I realized how ridiculous some of the words in these #1, chart topping hits are.
For example: “I know that I can’t take no more, it ain’t no lie, I want to see you out that door baby bye,bye,bye..” We ate this song up as teenagers. Learned the arm waving dance moves, all the words, loved the guys with their crazy hairdos… what was wrong with us? This is a bad song! When have you ever broken off a relation ship by telling a person to leave your house, goodbye that’s it, all over? Never. No breakup is that easy. First you need to tell the person every single thing you can’t stand about them anymore, then you have the “take your crap” roundup where you run around the house trying to gather up all their DVDs and clothes, then you fight in the doorway for another 20 minutes, THEN they leave. If you’re lucky.
What about: “My loneliness is killing me, and I, I must confess, I still believe (still believe) when I’m not with you I lose my mind, give me a sign, hit me baby one more time”. Now let’s just stop and think about this for a second. What exactly does “hit me” mean here? If it’s being used in the urban slang use as in “to hit that” then our parents should have never let us listen to this tart. So that’s not it. And surely she isn’t asking to be physically beaten, sooo? The song makes no sense. But did we care when we were 16? NO! Ever girl I knew, including me immediately bought a plaid skirt and experimented with putting her hair in pigtails. (And let’s be honest, they don’t look good on everyone) I still have that skirt.
My personal favorite in the “makes no sense” song genre is Candy Rain by Soul4Real. Remember? “My love, do you ever dream of, candy coated raindrops, you’re the same my candy rain.” What does it mean?! No idea. Either he’s comparing her to the rain (weird)or they played Candyland and now he had a dream about it… I don’t know, but those words made that group millionaires.
I’m sure I could go on with many more songs that make no sense whatsoever yet managed to be monster hits, but I need to stop because I can’t think straight- I keep hearing,“If you want to be my lover, you gotta get with my friends…”