So tonight we're going to the Forest of Fear. It's rated as the #3 Scariest Haunted House in the US. It has a monster, unrated, 26 room haunted house and scary people chasing you through the woods. My parents, Aunt, cousins & Fiance are all pumped up to go- they've been talking about it for weeks. I've been talking about it too, as in screaming-in-the-dead-of-the-night-in-terror talking about it. I HATE scary things. I know some people love being scared. Some call those people adventurous. I call them CRAZY (or Lauren). Why would you want to be terrified? Chased? Jumped out at? And they want us to PAy for this?
And what's worse, I let myself get dragged to these things year after year. And every year, THEY KNOW. The monsters smell the fear coming off of me in waves and they TARGET me! All the warning signs claim "The Actors will Not touch you". So you think, oh, good, I'll just look at them, and politelyand say, "yikes", then move merrily along my way... Yeah right. It's true, they don't touch you, but what the signs DON'T say is that the actors will come so far into your personal space you can see whether or not they need a Biore strip.
Last year we went to the haunted Graveyard. Every room we entered, the actors would look at the group of us, and move towards me like a magnet. There was one "butcher" in particular, with blood stains all over his smock and a giant ax who kept asking me if I wanted him to "Trim off a few pounds". Jerk.
I know they're actors, and that its not real. But WHAT IF people. What if some sick sick person decided to get a job at this place- its the perfect cover! You can hack someone to death in front of a crowd of people and they'll just cheer you on and think that the special effects are awesome. It could happen! Or what if I get so scared I run, and I run into something and trip and fall on a branch (let's face it, it wouldn't be the first time I've fallen in the woods, right Kappas?) Or if they forget to take the blade out of the chainsaw? I've seen CSI, there are like a trillion ways to die in freak accidents!
So that's where I'll be tonight.At the Forest of Fear, dragging my feet, sobbing and using my 12 year old cousin as a shield. If I have no voice on Monday, you'll know why. If I live that long...
love
14 years ago
2 comments:
Shaun was asking me about fright feast at 6 flags. I told him about how I went one year and they had this out doors trail type haunted house thing and it was super scary. I said the same exact thing... what if some freak decided to come in and really start chopping people up. No one would even know! How easy it would be to get kidnapped or grown-upnapped lol no one would think anything of your screams!!! SCARY!!!! But where is it because I totally want to go HAHAHA!
Oh and I almost peed my pants remembering the time you biffed it in the woods HAHAHA oh my gosh that was priceless!!!
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